Beyond the Game: Martin Seligman's Life Lessons from Bridge
What do you get when you combine the "father of positive psychology" with a lifelong passion for bridge? A masterclass in continuous learning, resilience, and the pursuit of excellence that transcends the card table.
Martin Seligman—the University of Pennsylvania psychologist who revolutionized our understanding of happiness, well-being, and human flourishing—has spent over 60 years playing bridge at the highest levels. He captained Princeton's championship team, earned over 50 regional titles, finished second in the prestigious 1998 Vanderbilt Cup, and regularly competed against world champions.
But here's what makes Seligman's bridge journey extraordinary: he approached the game with the same intellectual rigor that defined his groundbreaking psychological research. Bridge became both his laboratory and his teacher, offering insights that informed his professional work while providing profound life lessons applicable far beyond the game.
As someone who has played bridge for over two decades, I find Seligman's story deeply inspiring. His journey from an eight-year-old filling in at his mother's bridge table to competing at near-professional levels demonstrates that bridge offers endless opportunities for growth, regardless of where you start or how old you become.
Let me take you through Seligman's remarkable bridge odyssey and extract the timeless wisdom it offers all of us—whether we play bridge or not.
A Humble Beginning: When Psychology Meets 52 Cards
The Family Table (1950s)
Martin Seligman's bridge story begins in the 1950s in a setting familiar to many of us: the family living room. Young Martin, just eight years old, watched his mother and her friends play bridge with infectious enthusiasm. The clicking of cards, the thoughtful pauses, the triumphant declarations of successful contracts—it all captivated him.
Before long, he was pressed into service as the "fourth" when someone couldn't make it. This early immersion proved formative. Unlike learning from a textbook or formal instructor, Seligman absorbed bridge organically through observation, trial and error, and the patient (and sometimes impatient) guidance of adult players who expected him to keep up.
At age 12, Seligman played his first duplicate bridge game. The structured competitive format, where the same hands are played at multiple tables and results compared, revealed something crucial: bridge wasn't just a social pastime—it was a genuine test of skill where better decisions consistently produced better results.
Life Lesson #1: Start somewhere, anywhere. Expertise isn't required for entry—only curiosity and willingness to learn.
The Volatile Teacher: Learning Through Fire
Seligman's early bridge education included lessons from Winnie Slutsky, a local expert whose teaching style was... let's say "intense." Slutsky was volatile, prone to sharp criticism when young Martin made mistakes. Yet these difficult experiences taught him something valuable: how to accept criticism, extract useful feedback even when harshly delivered, and develop resilience in the face of setbacks.
In his later psychological research on learned helplessness and resilience, Seligman would explore how people respond to adversity. His bridge training with Slutsky was an early lesson in not letting criticism destroy your confidence—taking what's useful, discarding what's destructive, and continuing forward.
Life Lesson #2: Difficult teachers can impart valuable lessons. The question isn't whether feedback feels good, but whether it makes you better.
The Academic Champion: Bridge at Princeton
Leading Princeton to Victory
When Seligman arrived at Princeton University in the early 1960s, he immediately joined the bridge team. His skill quickly became apparent, and he was named team captain. Under his leadership, Princeton won the national collegiate championship—a remarkable achievement that demonstrated Seligman's emerging leadership abilities and strategic acumen.
Here was a young man excelling in two demanding arenas simultaneously: competitive bridge and rigorous philosophy studies at one of the world's top universities. The skills proved complementary. Bridge's requirement for logical thinking, probability calculation, and strategic planning enhanced his academic work. His philosophical training in clear reasoning and argumentation improved his bridge.
The Road Not Taken: Choosing Psychology Over Professional Bridge
After Princeton, Seligman faced a choice that many top young bridge players confront: pursue bridge professionally or follow a different career path. The allure of professional bridge was real—Seligman had the talent to compete at the highest levels and potentially earn a living through the game.
But he chose academia, pursuing philosophy at Oxford and later psychology at the University of Pennsylvania. Bridge became his "serious hobby" rather than his profession—yet this decision didn't diminish his commitment to excellence in the game.
Life Lesson #3: You can pursue excellence without making something your profession. Amateur doesn't mean mediocre—it means doing something for love rather than money.
Balancing Multiple Passions
Throughout his academic career—teaching at Cornell, joining Penn's faculty, conducting groundbreaking research on learned helplessness and eventually positive psychology—Seligman maintained his bridge practice. He played occasional duplicate games, kept his skills sharp, and never lost the passion that began at his mother's table.
This balance is instructive. Seligman could have abandoned bridge to focus exclusively on his psychological research. Instead, he recognized that bridge offered something his professional work didn't: direct competition, partnership dynamics, immediate feedback, and pure strategic challenge.
Life Lesson #4: Maintain multiple streams of intellectual engagement. Your "side passion" isn't a distraction from your "main work"—it's a complement that enriches both.
The Mid-Life Resurgence: Mentors Who Transform Your Game
Paul Soloway: The Autocrat
In the mid-1980s, Seligman's bridge career entered a new phase when he began playing with Paul Soloway, one of America's greatest players. Soloway was a bridge genius but had a teaching style that Seligman describes as "autocratic"—he told you what to do, you did it, and questions weren't particularly encouraged.
Under Soloway's guidance, Seligman won numerous regional championships. Soloway's expertise pushed Seligman to a higher level, teaching sophisticated techniques and partnership agreements that amateur players rarely master. Yet the relationship remained somewhat one-directional: Soloway as the expert dispensing wisdom, Seligman as the student receiving it.
This hierarchical dynamic produced results but didn't foster the kind of collaborative growth Seligman would later experience with other partners.
Life Lesson #5: Authoritarian teachers can accelerate your learning when you need technical skills quickly. Know when this approach serves you and when you've outgrown it.
Eric Rodwell: The Collaborator
Everything changed when Seligman began partnering with Eric Rodwell, one half of the legendary "Meckwell" partnership (Rodwell and Jeff Meckstroth, considered one of the greatest pairs in bridge history). Rodwell's approach was fundamentally different from Soloway's.
Where Soloway commanded, Rodwell collaborated. He asked Seligman's opinions, explained his reasoning, discussed alternatives, and treated their partnership as a joint intellectual exploration rather than master-apprentice relationship. This collaborative dynamic elevated Seligman's game to near-professional levels.
Rodwell's teaching philosophy aligned perfectly with Seligman's emerging ideas about positive psychology—that people flourish when they're engaged, when their strengths are utilized, when they have autonomy and purpose. Playing with Rodwell wasn't just about winning more; it was about deeper understanding and genuine partnership.
Life Lesson #6: Collaborative relationships unlock potential that hierarchical ones cannot. Seek partners and mentors who value your thinking, not just your compliance.
The 1998 Vanderbilt Cup: So Close to the Summit
The partnership with Rodwell led to Seligman's greatest competitive achievement: finishing second in the 1998 Vanderbilt Cup, one of North American bridge's most prestigious events. This was the equivalent of reaching the finals at Wimbledon or the World Series—the highest level of competition just one step from ultimate victory.
For most players, this would be a career pinnacle. For Seligman, then in his 50s and juggling a demanding academic career, it demonstrated that continuous improvement remains possible regardless of age when you find the right partners and maintain commitment to excellence.
Life Lesson #7: Peak performance doesn't require youth—it requires the right combination of skill, partnership, and strategic focus. Age can be an advantage when combined with experience and smart collaboration.
The Digital Revolution: Competing Globally from Home
OKBridge: The First Digital Frontier
In the 1990s, online bridge platforms emerged, and Seligman became user #1 on OKBridge, the pioneering platform that allowed real-time bridge games against opponents worldwide. This wasn't coincidence—Seligman immediately recognized the revolutionary potential of technology to transform bridge access and practice.
Suddenly, a University of Pennsylvania professor could play against Polish champions, Italian experts, and Swedish grandmasters at 2 AM from his Philadelphia home. Geography ceased to matter. Practice opportunities exploded. The learning accelerated.
Seligman embraced this digital transformation enthusiastically, spending countless hours competing online, particularly against Eastern European professionals known for aggressive, sophisticated styles that challenged American players accustomed to more conservative approaches.
The Polish Connection: Leszewski and Beyond
Seligman formed a particularly fruitful online partnership with Leszewski, a Polish professional whose style complemented Seligman's. Together, they achieved impressive results in online tournaments, with Seligman maintaining what he describes as an remarkable winning percentage.
Tragically, Leszewski died from COVID-19 in 2020—a profound loss for Seligman personally and for the bridge community. Yet even this loss illustrates bridge's unique capacity to create meaningful connections across continents and cultures. Seligman and Leszewski likely never met in person, yet their partnership was genuine and their friendship real.
Life Lesson #8: Technology can deepen rather than diminish human connection when used intentionally. Online communities can foster genuine relationships built on shared passion and mutual respect.
Continuous Competition into His 80s
Now in his 80s, Martin Seligman continues playing bridge regularly online. He maintains a high level of competition, continues learning new techniques, and still finds joy in the challenge of each new hand. This lifelong engagement with bridge demonstrates something profound about continuous learning and cognitive vitality.
Recent research (2024-2025) shows that bridge playing offers significant cognitive benefits, particularly for older adults. The game's demands—memory, calculation, strategic planning, psychological insight—keep neural pathways active and build cognitive reserve that helps maintain mental sharpness.
Seligman's own longevity and continued intellectual productivity (he published his most recent book in his late 70s) may well be supported by his decades of bridge playing, which serves as both mental exercise and source of flow and engagement.
Life Lesson #9: The learning never stops. The competition never ends. The joy remains. Continuous engagement with challenging activities throughout life supports cognitive health and psychological well-being.
The Psychology of Bridge: Observing Human Nature at the Table
Analytical vs. Intuitive Players
Throughout his bridge career, Seligman maintained his psychologist's observational stance. He noticed that successful bridge players fell into roughly two categories: analytical players like Eric Rodwell who approached each decision through calculation and logic, and intuitive players like Jeff Meckstroth who seemed to "feel" the right play through pattern recognition and unconscious processing.
Both styles could achieve world-class results, yet they represented fundamentally different cognitive approaches. Seligman incorporated these observations into his psychological writing, using bridge as a real-world laboratory for understanding how different minds solve complex problems.
Life Lesson #10: There isn't one "right way" to achieve excellence. Different cognitive styles can reach the same destination through different paths. Honor your natural approach while learning from those who think differently.
Emotional Regulation and Performance
Seligman also observed the crucial role of emotional regulation in bridge performance. Players who became frustrated, angry, or despondent after bad results consistently performed worse than those who maintained equanimity. Bridge offers immediate feedback on this dynamic—let one bad board affect your mood, and you'll make worse decisions on subsequent boards, creating a downward spiral.
This connects directly to Seligman's research on learned helplessness and explanatory style. Players who attribute bad results to temporary, specific causes ("I misread the position on that hand") recover quickly. Those who make global, permanent attributions ("I'm a terrible player") spiral into helplessness and poor performance.
Bridge became a laboratory for testing theories about resilience, optimism, and performance under pressure—insights that informed Seligman's later work on positive psychology and human flourishing.
Life Lesson #11: Your explanatory style—how you interpret setbacks—determines your resilience and future performance. Cultivate the habit of specific, temporary explanations for failures and permanent, pervasive explanations for successes.
Partnership Dynamics and Trust
Perhaps most importantly, bridge taught Seligman about partnership, trust, and collaborative performance. Bridge requires implicit trust in your partner's competence and integrity. You must trust that they're bidding honestly, playing optimally, and supporting the partnership even when individual hands go badly.
This dynamic mirrors healthy relationships in life—professional partnerships, marriages, friendships. The best partnerships balance individual excellence with subordination of ego to collective goals. They communicate clearly, share credit generously, and support each other through inevitable setbacks.
Life Lesson #12: Great partnerships require trust, clear communication, shared goals, and generous attribution. When things go right, credit your partner. When things go wrong, look first at your own contributions to the problem.
Seligman's Philosophy: Learn from Those Better Than Yourself
The Core Principle
When asked for advice to aspiring bridge players, Seligman consistently returns to one principle: surround yourself with players better than you and absorb everything they offer.
This seems simple, almost obvious. Yet most people avoid situations where they're the weakest performer. Ego protection leads us to seek contexts where we shine rather than stretch. Seligman did the opposite—he deliberately sought partnerships with world champions, played in events beyond his level, and embraced the discomfort of being outclassed.
This approach accelerated his learning dramatically. Playing with Soloway and Rodwell taught him more in years than decades playing with peers would have. Each session exposed him to thinking he couldn't have generated alone.
Life Lesson #13: Seek contexts where you're the least accomplished person in the room. The temporary ego bruising is a small price for accelerated growth.
Humility as Strength
Seligman's approach required profound humility—acknowledging that others knew more, played better, saw patterns he missed. Yet this humility wasn't weakness; it was strength. Only the secure can admit inadequacy. Only the truly confident can subordinate ego to learning.
This paradox appears throughout Seligman's work. His research on learned helplessness began with admitting that previous psychological models (including his own initial theories) were incomplete. His turn toward positive psychology required acknowledging that the field had overemphasized pathology at the expense of human flourishing.
Bridge taught him that admitting ignorance opens doors that false confidence keeps closed.
Life Lesson #14: True confidence allows you to admit what you don't know. False confidence requires pretending expertise you lack. The former grows; the latter stagnates.
The Minimization of Errors
Seligman describes top-level bridge as fundamentally about minimizing errors rather than maximizing brilliance. The flashy play that works spectacularly 80% of the time but fails catastrophically 20% of the time loses to the solid play that quietly succeeds 95% of the time.
This principle extends far beyond bridge. In investing, avoiding catastrophic losses matters more than hitting home runs. In medicine, "first, do no harm" precedes heroic interventions. In relationships, avoiding toxic behaviors matters more than grand gestures.
Bridge taught Seligman that excellence emerges from the accumulation of small correct decisions, not from occasional brilliance interrupted by frequent disasters.
Life Lesson #15: Consistent competence beats inconsistent brilliance. Focus on eliminating errors before pursuing spectacular successes.
Bridge and Positive Psychology: The Unexpected Connection
Flow State and Engagement
One of positive psychology's key concepts is "flow"—complete absorption in challenging activities that match your skill level. Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, who first studied flow extensively, actually used bridge players as research subjects because the game so reliably produces flow states.
Seligman's bridge playing exemplified this dynamic. At the table, hours passed unnoticed. Self-consciousness disappeared. The challenge of each hand demanded complete attention, eliminating mind-wandering and worry about past or future. This total present-moment focus is both the essence of flow and a component of well-being.
Bridge taught Seligman experientially what his research would later confirm: engagement in challenging activities is central to human flourishing.
Life Lesson #16: Seek activities that produce flow—challenging enough to demand full attention but not so difficult as to cause anxiety. These activities are portals to well-being.
Meaning Through Competition
Seligman's PERMA model of well-being includes Meaning—the sense that one's life serves purposes beyond oneself. Surprisingly, competitive bridge offered Seligman this dimension. Through his role as a bridge teacher and mentor, through his writing about bridge, through his contributions to the bridge community, he added meaning to his life.
This illustrates that meaning needn't come only from obviously noble pursuits like curing disease or feeding the hungry. It can emerge from any domain where you contribute to a community, help others improve, and leave things better than you found them.
Life Lesson #17: Meaning emerges when you contribute to domains you care about. The nobility of the domain matters less than the authenticity of your contribution.
Relationships at the Table
The R in PERMA stands for Relationships—positive connections with others. Bridge is fundamentally relational. Your partnership is an intimate collaboration requiring communication, trust, and mutual support. The bridge community provides friendships spanning decades and continents.
Seligman's bridge relationships enriched his life immeasurably. His partnerships with Soloway and Rodwell, his online connections with players worldwide, his membership in the larger bridge community—all provided social connection and belonging.
Life Lesson #18: Seek activities that inherently involve others. Solitary pursuits have their place, but well-being requires genuine connection through shared challenges and mutual support.
The Universal Lessons: What Bridge Teaches Everyone
Incomplete Information and Probabilistic Thinking
Bridge forces you to make decisions with incomplete information—you can't see your opponents' cards. You must use probability, inference from bidding, and reading of card play to construct likely distributions.
Life operates identically. We never have complete information. Every decision involves uncertainty. Bridge trains probabilistic thinking—estimating likelihoods, updating beliefs as new information emerges, and making optimal decisions despite uncertainty.
Life Lesson #19: Embrace uncertainty. Perfect information never arrives. Train yourself to make optimal decisions with the information available while remaining open to updating as more data emerges.
Long-Term Thinking
In bridge, sacrificing one hand to set up partner's long suit pays off over time. Taking slight risks to reach superior contracts produces better long-term results than always playing safe. Bridge rewards strategic thinking over tactical opportunism.
This mirrors life strategy. Short-term thinking optimizes the immediate moment at the expense of better long-term outcomes. Bridge taught Seligman that the long view—playing the percentages, building partnerships, continuously learning—beats short-term optimization.
Life Lesson #20: Optimize for the long term. Short-term setbacks often represent long-term investments. Play the percentages, knowing they work out over time even when individual instances disappoint.
Accepting Luck's Role
Despite being a game of tremendous skill, bridge includes luck. The cards you're dealt vary randomly. Sometimes you bid brilliantly and the cards break badly. Sometimes you bid poorly and get lucky.
Top players accept this reality. They focus on making optimal decisions and let results take care of themselves over time. This equanimity in the face of short-term variance is psychologically sophisticated and applicable far beyond bridge.
Life Lesson #21: Control your decisions, not your outcomes. Short-term results reflect both skill and luck. Long-term results reflect primarily skill. Focus on decision quality and let outcome variance average out.
Looking Forward: Bridge for the Next Generation
The Demographic Challenge
Seligman's story also highlights bridge's demographic challenge. He's in his 80s and still playing actively—wonderful for cognitive health but concerning for bridge's future. If the game's passionate practitioners are primarily senior citizens, where's the next generation?
This concern motivates much of Seligman's recent bridge-related work. He's passionate about introducing bridge to younger players, advocating for school bridge programs, and exploring how technology can make bridge more accessible and appealing to digital natives.
The Call to Action: If bridge offers the profound lessons Seligman's story illustrates, we have an obligation to pass it forward. This requires modernizing presentation, meeting young people where they are (online, mobile, social media), and demonstrating bridge's relevance to contemporary life.
Bridge's Role in Education
Seligman advocates strongly for bridge in educational settings. The game teaches:
Mathematical probability and calculation
Logical reasoning and strategic planning
Communication and partnership skills
Emotional regulation under pressure
Gracious winning and losing
These skills transfer directly to academic and professional success. Yet bridge remains absent from most school curricula, a missed opportunity Seligman hopes to address.
Life Lesson #22: Advocate for activities you believe develop valuable skills. Your passion can introduce others to transformative experiences they'd never discover independently.
The Journey Continues: Never Stop Learning
Martin Seligman's bridge story hasn't ended. In his 80s, he continues playing, continues learning new techniques, continues finding joy in the game that captivated him at age eight. His journey reminds us that:
Excellence is a lifelong pursuit, not a destination
Learning never stops if curiosity remains alive
Age is no barrier to continued growth and engagement
Passion sustained over decades enriches life immeasurably
What we do "for fun" can teach us as much as what we do professionally
As I reflect on my own 20+ years playing bridge, Seligman's story inspires me to approach the game—and life—with renewed commitment to continuous learning, generous partnership, and humble recognition that there's always more to discover.
Your Bridge Journey: What Will It Teach You?
You don't need to be a psychology pioneer to extract profound lessons from bridge. Every player, at every level, encounters the same fundamental challenges: managing uncertainty, collaborating with partners, learning from mistakes, persisting through setbacks, and pursuing excellence.
The question isn't whether bridge has lessons to teach—it's whether you're ready to learn them.
Ready to begin your own bridge journey and discover what the game has to teach you? The cards are waiting, and as Martin Seligman's 60+ year journey demonstrates, the learning never ends.
About the Author: Tracey Bauer is a member of the World Bridge Federation (WBF), United States Bridge Federation (USBF), and American Contract Bridge League (ACBL) with over 20 years of playing experience. Through Bridge Unleashed, she combines 30 years of marketing and technology expertise with her passion for bridge to help modernize the game and share its transformative lessons with new generations.
FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS (FAQ Section)
Who is Martin Seligman and why is he famous?
Martin Seligman is a psychologist at the University of Pennsylvania widely recognized as the "father of positive psychology." He revolutionized psychology by shifting focus from mental illness to human flourishing, well-being, and optimal functioning. His research on learned helplessness, explanatory style, and the PERMA model of well-being has influenced millions. Beyond psychology, Seligman is an accomplished bridge player with over 50 regional championships who finished second in the prestigious 1998 Vanderbilt Cup.
What life lessons can you learn from playing bridge?
Bridge teaches numerous transferable life skills: making decisions with incomplete information, thinking probabilistically, collaborating effectively with partners, managing emotions under pressure, accepting both skill and luck's roles in outcomes, learning continuously from those better than you, balancing short-term tactics with long-term strategy, and developing resilience through inevitable setbacks. These lessons apply directly to professional careers, relationships, and personal development.
How does bridge relate to positive psychology?
Bridge exemplifies several key positive psychology concepts. It creates "flow states" through complete absorption in optimally challenging activity. It builds meaningful relationships through partnership and community. It develops signature strengths like strategic thinking and emotional regulation. It provides clear goals and immediate feedback. Research shows bridge playing enhances cognitive function, delays cognitive decline, and supports psychological well-being—all central concerns of positive psychology.
What is Martin Seligman's advice for improving at bridge?
Seligman's core advice: surround yourself with players better than you and absorb everything they offer. Seek partnerships with superior players even when it bruises your ego. Play in events beyond your current level. Focus on minimizing errors rather than making brilliant plays. Study between games. Accept criticism and extract useful feedback. Most importantly, approach bridge as a lifelong learning journey rather than a destination to reach.
Can older adults benefit from playing bridge?
Absolutely. Research from 2024-2025 shows that regular bridge playing delays cognitive decline, enhances memory, improves executive function, and builds cognitive reserve that supports long-term brain health. Martin Seligman, now in his 80s, continues playing competitively and maintains remarkable cognitive vitality. Bridge provides mental stimulation, social connection, and engaging challenge—all crucial for healthy aging. The game's complexity keeps neural pathways active throughout life.
What makes Eric Rodwell different from other bridge teachers?
Eric Rodwell (one half of the legendary "Meckwell" partnership) distinguished himself through collaborative teaching rather than authoritarian instruction. Where some experts simply tell students what to do, Rodwell explained his reasoning, solicited opinions, and treated partnerships as joint intellectual explorations. This approach aligned with positive psychology principles about autonomy, engagement, and utilizing strengths. Seligman credits Rodwell's collaborative style with elevating his game to near-professional levels.
How has online bridge changed the game?
Online platforms like Bridge Base Online (BBO) revolutionized bridge by enabling 24/7 global competition from home. Martin Seligman was user #1 on OKBridge, immediately recognizing technology's potential. Online bridge eliminates geographic barriers, provides unlimited practice opportunities, allows learning from players worldwide, and makes high-level competition accessible regardless of location. The COVID-19 pandemic accelerated this transition, with millions now playing bridge primarily online while maintaining genuine connections and community.
What are the cognitive benefits of bridge compared to other games?
Bridge offers unique cognitive demands combining multiple skills simultaneously: memory (tracking played cards), probability calculation (computing odds), strategic planning (long-term thinking), psychological insight (reading opponents), communication (partnership bidding), and emotional regulation (managing frustration). This multi-dimensional complexity creates more comprehensive brain stimulation than single-focus games. Research shows bridge players exhibit neural patterns similar to chess grandmasters, with enhanced activity in regions associated with working memory, pattern recognition, and strategic thinking.
